DEN BUILDING retreat
I hosted a retreat with my friend Hugo. We invited 20 people to Jamies Farm in South Wales and spent the weekend deep in a Forest of Dean - a forest teeming with strange spooky magic activity, wild boar and wizard-like characters living in yurts.
Over the weekend we contributed to the spooky magic by building the most epic forest den you can imagine. Easily 10x bigger and more fantastic than any forest den I have ever seen. Which makes sense because most of the time forest dens are built by children, who are generally smaller than adults.
We were 20 adults, which, it turns out, is the perfect amount for den construction.
The beauty of den construction is that there aren’t really any rules. It’s just pick up branches from the floor, lean them against things, and make something that you can crawl into and be silly.
Which means that there is no need for planning or designing or getting planning permission or drawing or buying materials or health and safety. Just pure creation.
Step one, find a spot
Step two, everyone get as many branches as possible and pile them on newfound spot.
Step three, freestyle build some crazy den. Spend no time asking “shall we do x” or “we should do y” and everyone just do.
And thats it. However, the result was unexpected.
I expected a silly weekend in which a group of adults played around in the forest, acted like kids, and laughed a lot.
We made sure that the group was mostly strangers… only 2 or three people knew each other…
And we bought really nice ingredients for delicious meals.
And we stayed in a seriously beautiful place. (thanks Jamies Farm)
The weekend passed perfectly, and at the end, before anyone left, we sat around the table and asked everyone to say what the point of the weekend was. And everyone, all twenty of us, gave a little speech.
Most people commented on the fact that they accepted our invitation despite having absolutely no idea what we would be doing. Most people said that they had seriously enjoyed building a really epic den. Many people said that they had made some uniquely fast, deeply meaningful connections. Sam said that “we spend our entire childhoods trying to be adults and then our entire adulthood trying to figure out how to feel like kids again”. Sienna said “this weekend has been exactly my idea of a good time. It reminds me of something my boss often says.. ‘I’m deadly serious about having a good time’”. My sister said “I have just moved to London and have spent the last month or so hearing everyone tell me to keep my head down, not smile at anyone, just keep walking and be safe and this weekend has given me a break from that - it has allowed me to completely lower my guard and instantly connect with people”. And then my mom started crying and said things so powerful and beautiful that other people teared up and started crying, and I felt so overwhelmed and delighted by the experience that I forgot the weeks of planning and stress leading to this moment, and I forgot about the time I promised myself “to stop organising events and just chill out” and I instantly started planning the next one.
All my love,
Sebastian